Musings from the God of Cities

last night i had the gayest dream ever. i forget how it started out, but basically it was madonna (in a maroon dress and small hat that looked like what she wore in “evita”) and i in some large department store-type place. they were having some big to-do there, and were handing out lots of free samples of makeup. in the waking world i’ve always prided myself on always taking overmany free samples whenever they’re available, so why should i be different in the dreaming world? madonna and i walked around the department store and kept taking free samples of makeup. no one made a big fuss about madonna, even though she is a celebrity. i don’t really remember if that struck me as odd at all (in the dream). we were walking around, and i went to go grab some odd looking piece of make-up (like a compact or somesuch) but then we got mildly scolded because it wasn’t a free sample. at this point, we’re by the escalators and we run into bette midler. she’s pretty massively fat, like 400+ pounds, and looks just really awful, her face was very puffy and red, like she’d had some allergic reaction to something which caused her face to swell up so badly. she turns to madonna and says, “my nickname is ‘mo’ and so is yours. you should change it.” and then i woke up.